Brandon at Random Reviews

Introductory Rant

You know a movie has made it in pop culture when there are people who boast about how they’ve never seen any of the movies in the franchise. “Hey, look at me, I’ve never seen a Star Wars movie in my entire life despite how overwhelmingly surrounded I am by it!” Great. No one cares. It’s one thing to say you’ve never seen a popular movie, it’s quite another to act like you’re hot shit for it or something. It’s not impressive. I’m sure a lot of people haven’t seen the 14-hour versions of “The Lord of the Rings” movies, but I never hear someone say they haven’t and act like it makes them fucking cool for being able to say that, but I digress. This is gonna be a long one.

Despecialized?

You’re probably wondering why I’ve gathered you all here today, it’s to talk about a certain culturally significant sci-fi epic space opera film that was released in 1977 and has since grown to previously unheard of levels of popularity and spawned a number of sequels, TV shows, merchandise, and so on and so forth. Now, some thing’s have been done to the movies in this original trilogy that includes “Star Wars”, “The Empire Strikes Back”, and “Return of the Jedi” especially since their theatrical release by the man who originally made/big-pictured their original stories, George Lucas. By the way, the movie titles are as I’ve listed them. No different. Lucas tried to go back and retcon these titles so they would have a thematic naming scheme, but it was too late George. People already knew the movies by those names, fuck-face. I fear no one would’ve been as willing to check out “Star Wars Episode IV: A New Hope” if they saw that on a marquee, so think about that.

George also modified the footage in the films to varying degrees, sometimes more severely than others. Lucas claimed that these alterations were merely things that he wanted in the movies when he released them, but because of budget and technological constraints, he couldn’t. In the first film, he went back and did the most damage. He was “fixing” fucking everything. He put shit in that wasn’t there before, he altered what were perfectly fine and well-liked scenes, it was catastrophic. What made it worse was the original versions went out of print with the sudden push for these special editions, and the original cuts became increasingly rare.

As all this had been occurring and upsetting Star Wars fans on a global scale a hero Czech teacher named Petr Harmáček (known by his online handle “Harmy”) emerged and led a project to develop high-quality versions of the original trilogy to release on the web that were meant to serve as being as close to original theatrical releases as possible, orchestrated by a large group of Star Wars enthusiasts. They took several different versions of the movie and spliced them all together and digital restored the movies in a way previously thought impossible. According to Wikipedia, LaserDisc versions of the movies were used essentially as a baseline, then footage from other home video releases that had come out over the years were used to reinvigorate the film to near HD standards. It’s a miracle. It actually looks amazingly good, especially in the original, the one with the most damage previously done. They are known as the “Despecialized Editions” and according to the Wiki page, they are officially free and skirt a line between copyright infringement and fair use. Disney has not sought legal action against those who distribute these versions. Yet.

I must say it is such a shame that the man who created what so many people indeed love and hold near and dear has since come under such a large amount of ridicule for these…unnecessary transgressions. People claimed Lucas ruined their childhood and shit, which is a bit much. What he did was annoying, but it was made worse by the fact that the versions people loved were unable to view for so long. Anyway, let’s get into the actual fucking movie and stop talking about what a gift and curse George Lucas is.

The Cast

Star Wars features the acting talents of Mark Hamill as Luke Skywalker, who is our protagonist. He can be a little whiny in the first act, but I guess it does make sense for his age and the fact that he’s been working for his Uncle Owen as something called “moisture farmer” on a desert planet named Tatooine and that seems like something I’d whine about at 34. Hamill didn’t have much of a live-action career that I know of following these movies, but he did find an immense talent for voice acting, and among other characters, he voiced Batman’s arch-nemesis The Joker starting in “Batman the Animated Series” and in several iterations since. Immensely talented guy, he just got pretty typecast in his role as Luke.

Harrison Ford portrays Han Solo, a rough around the edges smuggler. The roughness of this character was one of the many things George Lucas tried to “smooth out”, Google “Han Shot First” to see what kind of shit I’m talking about. Harrison Ford is a fucking rockstar actor, it could be argued that Star Wars launched his career. He ultimately has become one of the most illustrious Hollywood names, like, ever. He never had the issue of only being known as Han.

Carrie Fisher was a treasure as Princess Leia Organa. She was such a strong character. She never backed down from shit. Leia was the only female character with the exception of Luke’s Aunt Beru who has like one decent scene in this flick. The Princess honestly kicked ass, and popular movies needed that then (and still do now). I think we all needed that. Thank goodness. Also, not to be that guy, but it helped that she was super hot. She also got typecast and was stuck in the small supporting role zone for much of the rest of her career until her passing in late 2016. I was in the hospital heavily in and out of consciousness when I heard she died, it broke my heart.

Alec Guinness as Obi-Wan “Ben” Kenobi, James Earl Jones as the badass voice of the villainous Darth Vader, Anthony Daniels as the ever annoying droid C-3PO, and Peter Cushing is underrated as the evil Grand Moff Tarken. This cast is spectacular in retrospect.

The Story (No Spoilers)

How do I put this without overselling it…Star Wars is the platinum standard for movie length, pacing, number of characters, scoring (will touch on this later), and the overall non-specificness of made up lingo to help transcend time.

I wouldn’t call this plot simple by any means. It is to-the-point. It never dawdles with anything for any amount of time that could be deemed too lengthy. Each scene accomplishes exactly what it should. Luke’s sick of being stuck on Tatooine? Well, let’s not dwell on that, something is already in motion to make that change. Every plot point is made necessary and is thus satisfying. It’s fucking great guys. I really love it.

The Score

John Williams is the best there ever was or ever will be. George Lucas chose him because he wanted a true orchestral instrumental score, not the typical scores that were popping up in space movies at that time. It was a great call. Good job George.

Legacy

Like I said. This 1 movie produced a multi-billion dollar franchise including: sequels, shows, toys, clothing, video games, novels, comic books, neck ties, watches, chia pets, board games, puzzles, cookbooks, holiday specials, costumes, blankets, kites, water flotation devices, bikes, posters, shower curtains, soap dispensers, soaps, cardboard cutouts, watering cans, stuffed animals, podcasts, legos, toasters, waffle irons, wall art, pillows, popcorn makers, bobble-heads, jewelry, glassware, silverware, dishes, crockpots, luggage, night lights, Bluetooth speakers, coin banks, wallets, helmets, welcome mats, school supplies, outlet and light switch covers, and there is most definitely more than that. They thought George Lucas was a fool for wanting merchandising rights. Pfft.

In Conclusion

Star Wars is a spectacular movie by itself. Amazing acting. Small budget. Great score. Terrific storytelling. I. Love. This. Motion. Picture.

⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️